**T/W – SUICIDAL THOUGHTS** (T/W = Trigger Warning) Well, it’s been about two weeks now, and I’m still feeling depressed. Actually, it’s getting noticeably worse. My fears that it won’t go away on its own (even after discontinuing the Wellbutrin), I’ll have to quit tutoring, and have to do TMS again are all looming on the horizon. Not to mention all the related issues. I have little interest in doing anything; my ability to focus and concentrate have gone…
**Today’s post is a little different. Consider it an Open Letter to those who think depression and other mental illnesses are a choice and that we can just ‘snap out of it’.** Most of my friends are really good people. In fact, that’s a prerequisite if you want to be my friend. They are open-minded, thoughtful, fair-minded, and they don’t judge. (Yes, people like that really do exist!) However, I do occasionally run into someone who is judgmental and…
Finding a good doctor can be difficult. Finding a good pdoc (psychiatrist) even more so. Once, while I was in a psych unit, the doctor there told me that my wife “would end up in a nursing home” because she has MS. I cannot tell you how much that upset me – and her! MS is not a death sentence, nor does everyone end up in a wheelchair needing care 24/7. I saw him once at his office after I…
I have been living with severe depression for 35 years, since I was 14. It has been a massive, exhausting, demanding burden for the vast majority of that time. I’ll spare you the details – for now – but suffice to say that my life has not turned out the way I expected it to. Although I’ve been able to accomplish some goals – marriage, Bachelor’s and Master’s Degrees, a mostly-fulfilling career in social services, a move to California –…
I have a beef with the insurance industry. According to the Social Security Administration, I’ve been disabled due to my Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) since August 29, 2005. (Yes, I know – that’s a long fucking time.) For those of you not in-the-know, after two years of being on Social Security Disability (aka SSDI, which is NOT the same as SSI), you get to sign up for Medicare (unless you’re covered by a spouse’s policy). You may or may not…
I hope my last post didn’t scare you away from taking action. That was certainly not my intention! In all honesty, admitting myself to the psych unit has saved my life at least a few times. And they’ve all kept me safe. Part I of this series was just a (very) general overview of the state of psychiatric units. It was meant to be educational, not scary. Yet, I can’t help but feel like I may have gotten a little on…
Whenever I hear someone use the term “psycho ward”, it’s often part of a *joke*. Well, trust me, there’s nothing funny about it. The image I assume people get in their heads is from the book One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey, or the subsequent movie, starring Jack Nicholson and a number of recognizable-but-not-yet-famous actors (including Scatman Crothers, Danny DeVito, and Christopher Lloyd). (Damn that Nurse Ratched! She is EVIL! She’s so good, actress Louise Fletcher won an Oscar for…
