I’ve started this post so many times, I can’t count them all, lol. I feel the need to talk about a science-based theory called neuroplasticity, and even though it’s a simple concept, it’s hard to explain. I will try my best. If you’ve been reading the Keepin’ it Real blog for any amount of time, you know I suffered greatly from major depressive disorder (MDD) for more than 30 years. I was suicidal much of that time and endured a…
Image credit: Brian Mann on Unsplash I just got home from therapy with Jacqueline, and we did some good talking. In response, I have something a little different to start off today’s post: A pop quiz! Shout out the first thing that comes to your mind: Which comes first – thoughts, feelings, or behaviors? The answer is: All of the above! That’s right, folks. Today’s post is about the never-ending cycle of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. WAS THAT A…
Image credit: Valentin Petkov on Unsplash The holidays are upon us once again! And whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, or any other holiday, you might be feeling a little extra stress. How am I going to make it? you may be asking yourself. To that, I say that you’ve survived every previous holiday, and you’ll survive this one, too. THE STRESS OF THE HOLIDAY SEASON There are a few extra variables involved when we celebrate the holidays….
Image credit: Dayne Topkin **MHMs are shorter posts designed to be a quicker read than my usual posts. Today’s MHM tackles something we don’t talk about enough: Hope.** I wasn’t officially diagnosed with major depressive disorder until I was 47 years old. That was partly my fault, because I did not seek psychiatric help until I was 33, although I’d been in therapy for several years. I’d been very depressed most of my life; I don’t really know why…
Image credit: Tim Mossholder on Unsplash Depression and anxiety ruled my life for 35 years. And although my depression sometimes seemed to come out of the blue, in retrospect, I can see that there were almost always signs. It’s taken a long time, but I was finally able to figure out that it usually comes on gradually. I have also learned some of the signs to look out for. When they pop up (and they still do occasionally, even…
Do you know the difference between a therapist and a psychiatrist? Many people don’t; they think these terms are interchangeable. A therapist can be a psychologist (someone with a PhD), a licensed social worker, a licensed marriage and family therapist, or a few others. (NOTE: Many insurance companies will only pay for therapy from people with certain degrees or licensure and sometimes put a limit on the number of sessions you can attend each year. Make sure to check before…
Image credit: Isaac Quesada on Unsplash I’ve felt really good for most of the last year and a half now, and for literally the first time in my 52 years, my depression is in remission. That’s a BIG freaking deal! 😊 But that does not mean I’m completely out of the woods, and it certainly doesn’t mean that it can’t come back and take me down at any time. While I’m feeling decent and going about my life, my…
Image credit: Brooke Cagle on Unsplash My therapist recently asked me what happiness means to me. I didn’t have an immediate answer for her. I had to think about it. Naturally, happiness means different things to different people, and the road there varies. Some people think being rich will make them happy. Some believe they will be happy after they find Mr. or Ms. Right and have 2.3 kids, a picket fence, and a dog. While I believe that…
Image credit: Caroline Selfors on Unsplash Not too long ago, I was thinking how hard it is to imagine how horrible I felt most of my life. I figured that was a good sign, being so far removed from it. Maybe I would never feel that way again. But then my girlfriend and I watched a movie called The Perks of Being a Wallflower. Have you seen it? It’s about a boy in ninth grade who gets picked on…
Image by Finn on Unsplash I’ve been living with depression since 1984, and believe me, I’ve heard a lot of ignorant comments about mental health issues. One comment stands out the most: “What do YOU have to be depressed about?” I’ve wanted to smack each person who asked me that! If you have a history of depression, you know how much damage a question like that can do. Not only is it painfully ignorant but it’s also rude. It…
Image credit: Vladislav Babienko Last month, I wrote a post that posited that if you change your behaviors, your thoughts will follow. In other words, instead of endlessly waiting for the motivation to do something, just do the thing. Your thoughts will eventually follow and reinforce what you’re doing, which, in turn, becomes a habit – hopefully a healthy one, like working out. Our experiences can actually change the neural pathways in our brains. This is called neuroplasticity. As…
Image credit: George Pagan III on Unsplash I used to think that everything I told myself had to be true, that the stories I told myself (like that I was no good and I was damaged) were factual. When my brain would tell me that I was always going to be depressed – and it told me that constantly – I believed it. And when it told me, “You don’t deserve to be loved; you are not worthy,” I…
Image credit: Hello, I’m Nik on Unsplash DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) is a treatment for depression which has been paramount in changing my attitude as well as the stories I tell myself. It has made a big difference in my life. It occurred to me recently, though, that I’ve never written a post about it; I’ve just poked and prodded at it. That’s been a big oversight on my part, and it changes now. As one of only two…
**TW: SUICIDAL IDEATION** This post is full of Hope. But it is also about surviving depression and suicidal thoughts; thus, the trigger warning. If you are feeling sensitive to such things right now, don’t read it. You can always skip it or come back to it later, when you’re feeling stronger. Image credit: Sydney Sims I’ve started this blog post four times and, dammit, this one is going to stick! LOL The first version was about Seasonal Affective…
Image credit: Glenn Carstens-Peters About a month ago, I was feeling quite depressed. And since my depression had been in remission for a while, I was surprised. Despite knowing from experience that I would eventually feel better and be able to get through my days without feeling that damn hole in my heart, I still felt distraught. Depression makes you feel like it’s never going to get better, that you will always feel that way. It is the nature…
There are many negative terms used to describe someone with a mental illness. Indulge me for a moment: Crazy and the related “Cray-Cray” Weird/Weirdo Nuts/Nutso Stupid Psycho Cracker Jacks (There simply is no limit on derogatory terms) There is also a number of derogatory terms used in place of “psychiatric unit”: Nuthouse Psycho ward Looney bin (Fill in the blank) These are all hurtful words that can damage a person’s psyche, especially if they already suffer from low self-esteem and…
They say that hindsight is 20/20, right? That’s good, because I totally blanked on Suicide Prevention Awareness Week (Sept. 8-14) and World Suicide Prevention Awareness Day (Sept. 10) this year. At least I didn’t miss the entire Suicide Prevention Awareness Month! In hindsight, I realize that I need to be a little more organized when it comes to these things. I haven’t been on the Twitter machine much lately, so I didn’t see the hashtags that are associated with these…
Hey, Warrior! Happy Wednesday! 🙂 I was just reading an email from a very wise, emotionally healthy woman, clinical psychologist Dr. Gail Brenner. I have two of her books. One is called The End of Self-Help: Discovering Peace and Happiness Right at the Heart of Your Messy, Scary, Brilliant Life, which I haven’t finished yet, but has helped change my outlook on things. Her newest book (2018) is called Suffering is Optional: A Spiritual Guide to Freedom from Self-Judgment and…
