Image credit: Michael Dziedzic on unsplash Victim. That’s how I saw myself for three decades, only I didn’t realize it. I was a victim of depression and all the negative thoughts, falsehoods, and forces it entails. It grabbed a hold of me, thrashed me around, and spit me out. It nearly killed me – more than once. I tried to fight it, stuff it, sidestep it, ignore it, deny it, and I constantly tried to work through it. But…
Image credit: Thomas Bormans on Unsplash Welcome to Mental Health Moment (MHM) #13! MHMs are short posts that I write every once in a while as a break from my usual 1500- to 1800-word posts, for your convenience. 😊 This one is a list of simple and effective ways of feeling productive, even on the days when you don’t think you can do anything. LIFE IS NOT BLACK AND WHITE As one of my therapists told me several years…
Image credit: Brian Mann on Unsplash I just got home from therapy with Jacqueline, and we did some good talking. In response, I have something a little different to start off today’s post: A pop quiz! Shout out the first thing that comes to your mind: Which comes first – thoughts, feelings, or behaviors? The answer is: All of the above! That’s right, folks. Today’s post is about the never-ending cycle of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. WAS THAT A…
Image credit: Valentin Petkov on Unsplash The holidays are upon us once again! And whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, or any other holiday, you might be feeling a little extra stress. How am I going to make it? you may be asking yourself. To that, I say that you’ve survived every previous holiday, and you’ll survive this one, too. THE STRESS OF THE HOLIDAY SEASON There are a few extra variables involved when we celebrate the holidays….
Image credit: Dayne Topkin **MHMs are shorter posts designed to be a quicker read than my usual posts. Today’s MHM tackles something we don’t talk about enough: Hope.** I wasn’t officially diagnosed with major depressive disorder until I was 47 years old. That was partly my fault, because I did not seek psychiatric help until I was 33, although I’d been in therapy for several years. I’d been very depressed most of my life; I don’t really know why…
Yoga. Tennis. Playing the piano. Softball. Bowling. Photography. Reading for pleasure. What do these things have in common? They are all things that help me feel better. The bigger question is why do I stop doing them when I know they will brighten my mood and could actually help to delay (or derail) a depressive episode? I know I’m not alone in this, although for the longest time, I thought I was. Why do we stop doing the things that…
Image credit: Tim Mossholder on Unsplash Depression and anxiety ruled my life for 35 years. And although my depression sometimes seemed to come out of the blue, in retrospect, I can see that there were almost always signs. It’s taken a long time, but I was finally able to figure out that it usually comes on gradually. I have also learned some of the signs to look out for. When they pop up (and they still do occasionally, even…
Photo credit: Christian Erfurt on Unsplash So, Lisa and I went to a concert last week by a band called Badflower. They’re a heavy alternative rock band, and their performance was awesome! We decided to make an evening out of it – dinner and the show. Sounds good, right? Well, my anxiety had other plans for me. It was out of hand from the moment we left the house until after we got to the concert. I was shaky,…
Do you know the difference between a therapist and a psychiatrist? Many people don’t; they think these terms are interchangeable. A therapist can be a psychologist (someone with a PhD), a licensed social worker, a licensed marriage and family therapist, or a few others. (NOTE: Many insurance companies will only pay for therapy from people with certain degrees or licensure and sometimes put a limit on the number of sessions you can attend each year. Make sure to check before…
Image credit: Isaac Quesada on Unsplash I’ve felt really good for most of the last year and a half now, and for literally the first time in my 52 years, my depression is in remission. That’s a BIG freaking deal! 😊 But that does not mean I’m completely out of the woods, and it certainly doesn’t mean that it can’t come back and take me down at any time. While I’m feeling decent and going about my life, my…
Image credit: Ryan Searle on Unsplash Welcome to MHM #11! Mental Health Moments are shorter posts that include tips and suggestions for getting through your day without letting your depression get you down. I tend to be a bit wordy in my regular posts; MHMs are my attempt to be a little more palatable for those who don’t want to read longer posts. And now, onto the show! Spring has sprung and we’re on our way to a nice-looking…
Image credit: Brooke Cagle on Unsplash My therapist recently asked me what happiness means to me. I didn’t have an immediate answer for her. I had to think about it. Naturally, happiness means different things to different people, and the road there varies. Some people think being rich will make them happy. Some believe they will be happy after they find Mr. or Ms. Right and have 2.3 kids, a picket fence, and a dog. While I believe that…
Image credit: Vladislav Babienko Last month, I wrote a post that posited that if you change your behaviors, your thoughts will follow. In other words, instead of endlessly waiting for the motivation to do something, just do the thing. Your thoughts will eventually follow and reinforce what you’re doing, which, in turn, becomes a habit – hopefully a healthy one, like working out. Our experiences can actually change the neural pathways in our brains. This is called neuroplasticity. As…
Image credit: George Pagan III on Unsplash I used to think that everything I told myself had to be true, that the stories I told myself (like that I was no good and I was damaged) were factual. When my brain would tell me that I was always going to be depressed – and it told me that constantly – I believed it. And when it told me, “You don’t deserve to be loved; you are not worthy,” I…
**TW: SUICIDAL IDEATION** This post is full of Hope. But it is also about surviving depression and suicidal thoughts; thus, the trigger warning. If you are feeling sensitive to such things right now, don’t read it. You can always skip it or come back to it later, when you’re feeling stronger. Image credit: Sydney Sims I’ve started this blog post four times and, dammit, this one is going to stick! LOL The first version was about Seasonal Affective…
Image credit: Ylanite Koppens I was born to write. Unfortunately, I was also born to be depressed. Keeping a traditional journal is one way to get your thoughts and feelings out of your head so you can take a more objective look at them. But writing long-form, even if it’s a rules-free method such as free association or a “vomit draft,” in which you write down whatever comes to mind without censoring it, takes time, energy, and commitment. I…
Image credit: Glenn Carstens-Peters About a month ago, I was feeling quite depressed. And since my depression had been in remission for a while, I was surprised. Despite knowing from experience that I would eventually feel better and be able to get through my days without feeling that damn hole in my heart, I still felt distraught. Depression makes you feel like it’s never going to get better, that you will always feel that way. It is the nature…
There are many negative terms used to describe someone with a mental illness. Indulge me for a moment: Crazy and the related “Cray-Cray” Weird/Weirdo Nuts/Nutso Stupid Psycho Cracker Jacks (There simply is no limit on derogatory terms) There is also a number of derogatory terms used in place of “psychiatric unit”: Nuthouse Psycho ward Looney bin (Fill in the blank) These are all hurtful words that can damage a person’s psyche, especially if they already suffer from low self-esteem and…
